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Aug. 7th, 2017 10:06 pm
komadori: (Default)
I've been really tired today, and I haven't really done anything all day. I started out by organizing and messing around with my Spotify playlists. There are a lot of good albums that I never listen to, so I have started dumping the albums that I remember liking into playlists separated by decades. Depending on how many albums I can recall, these playlists could end up being massive. This is still better than my old organizational system, which is basically nonexistent. I will probably try to make some genre playlists, but that will have to wait. I'm not sure if I should put Broadway cast recordings in the individual decade playlists or put them into one giant, all-consuming Broadway playlist. I'm leaning toward the latter because of the amount of tracks on albums and the fact that revivals can feature music from decades earlier than when they were recorded.

Organizing music on Spotify is a big thing for me because I own very little music myself. When I was growing up, I bought almost no music aside from anime CDs. I listened to Japanese music almost exclusively until I was about 15, except for when I was listening to the radio in the car. By the time that I started listening to English music more often, I had already discovered the joys of music piracy and downloading. I built up and lost my mp3 collection several times over because I never backed anything up. Eventually, I stopped downloading mp3s and switched to streaming via... Last.fm in 2006, I think? Now that I think of it, I think I started listening to Yahoo's Launchcast personalized radio first... does anyone remember that? I always thought I would re-download my old collection from iTunes, but based on the volume of music that I had listened to over the years as well as my changing tastes, I never did. So, basically, I'm trying to get together all the new and old music that I've ever loved and can still enjoy in one place.

Anyway, I got really tired after that. I blame it on waking up several times during the night and having a dream about turning into an evil witch with my best friend from elementary school. I don't know where exactly that came from, but it felt pretty vivid at the time. I have taken to listening to audio books and podcasts while I'm trying to fall asleep, and I frequently fall asleep with them still playing. I was listening to the Welcome to Night Vale novel last night, so maybe that is to blame.

The only other thing that I can blame for being exhausted today is that I have been active more often than usual in the past two weeks. It all started with Portland. The week before last, I was in Portland for a few days. That involved a lot of walking and getting lost on public transportation. I walked 4+ miles each day, and I was able to eat at a cool British pub called The Raven and the Rose, so I was pretty happy.

On Thursday of last week, I went to Catalina for my grandma's birthday because they offer free boat trips to the island for people celebrating their birthdays as well as one guest. It felt like I spent most of my time riding around on the back of a golf cart and listening to music, but I did end up walking 3.3 miles. I also bought a unicorn necklace because I am clearly an eleven year old girl on the inside. XD; Altogether, it was a good day, and I spent the ride home out on deck to experience the wind and sea spray while staring at the sea and darkening sky. It has been so long since I've been out to sea like that, so I regret nothing.

On Friday, I stayed home for most of the day, but I went to Fullerton in the evening to get coffee at the Night Owl. Then, I found out that my aunt was making tacos, so we went over there for dinner.

On Saturday, I went back to Fullerton to try a pizza place called Fuoco. It was good but way more authentic than I am used to. Then, I went to the Tranquil Tea Lounge where I ordered a white tea and mochi ice cream. It was the first time I had mochi ice cream before, and I loved it. Overall, I walked 1.5 miles that day.

On Sunday, I went to Torrance with my family to visit an old neighbor of theirs. I used it as an excuse to stop by Mitsuwa for the first time. I did not realize that that place was so big! I wish I had more time to spend there, but I did get some snacks as well as a discounted tea set. I want to visit the one in Costa Mesa since it is about the same distance as the one in Torrance. Overall, I walked 1.3 miles that day.

So, it's probably not the walking that has made me tired because I've actually felt better on days that I've walked more. I'm guessing that it is the social interaction and maybe just being out. I think that this is the same thing that makes me feel so exhausted during the semester because I can be out for only a few hours and feel drained. That is why it is so hard to balance my classes with anything else. I don't interact with people a lot, but just being there can make me feel self-conscious and nervous... it is not fun. It is worst at the beginning of the semester, especially if I don't know the professor. Usually, it gets better after a month or so, but I still carry a lot of stress and tension with me which can be very draining.

Last but not least, I did not start my new writing goals because I have felt tired and distracted. I decided that I should get started on a day when I actually feel good, but maybe that's just an excuse. It's so hard to start things and find motivation.

Dreaming

Jun. 21st, 2016 09:55 pm
komadori: (Default)
Thankfully, the heat has decided to take a vacation for a while. Apparently, it was over 100 yesterday, but it was no hotter than the low 80s today. I've been enjoying some cool breezes from my window, but the heat kept me from sleeping last night. I don't think I was able to get to sleep until nearly 3 AM. When I did sleep, I had a haunted house-related dream/nightmare. I don't remember anything particularly creepy except for a general feeling of foreboding and the unease of finding myself alone in a dark, old house that was allegedly haunted. I blame this on reading The Haunting of Hill House—which was my first real ghost story ever—and starting Neil Gaiman’s American Gods where Spoilers ). I don’t feel particularly tired as I was able to sleep in quite a bit, but I do feel a bit listless and uninspired which is a common side effect of not sleeping enough in my life.
komadori: (Default)
Ugh, I just love waking up from a romantic and loving dream to an unromantic reality. :( It's kind of perfect that "Someone Like You" by Adele is playing while I type this. Even though it has been overplayed and is nowhere near new to me, I still love this song to bits. This song would be an excellent basis for a fic, but I'm sure someone has already done that. Maybe I could try writing something with Cecil/Earl Harlan. I do love unrequited love and pining, so this would fit them perfectly.

...And this is why I need to write fics more often!

Anyway, I believe I was engaged in my dream. This makes perfect sense because a slew of my childhood acquaintances and friends have gotten married lately. My family has been talking about the upcoming wedding of one of them in January, and I've been trying to not cry whenever it has been spoken about. Fortunately, my family is not one to bother me about getting married or having grandkids (spoiler: there will be no grandkids!), but that doesn't change how left behind I feel. It seems that it's always like this, and the winter holidays don't make anything better. I realize that a good portion of my reason for being alone is my own fault, but that doesn't change how disheartening it is, especially when the only solution is to put myself through painful situations to make my life better.

For this reason, I don't regret giving my gift to favorite guy. I hope it wasn't too silly or inappropriate, but even if it was, I feel like I have a good reason for giving it to him.

Anyway, I now return you to your regularly scheduled Christmas Eve.
komadori: (Default)
My mind is teeming with thoughts tonight, so I should probably write them down. Anyway, I need to write more. As far as school goes, my personal statement is essentially done, but I need to rework a few things before tomorrow if I can harness my powers of concentration for long enough to do so. I've fallen behind on most of my shows, and I haven't been having as much fun as I think I should. However, I did just have a dream about a Fifty Shades kind of relationship, which is strange because I have never been in love with Christian Grey.

Lately, I have become addicted to the browser game Fallen London. This is not a new game at all, but it is new to me. Since I am just dipping my toes into the waters of accessible games, I was happy to find this game at random without even looking. I found out about it through an advertisement on the Welcome to Night Vale subreddit; how perfect is that? That's some excellent marketing, Reddit. Anyway, I'm AnElusiveDreamer there. It's a very fitting game to be advertised beside Night Vale.

Other things, other things... I read the Night Vale novel not too long ago. I started reading Life and Death: Twilight Reimagined, but I got bored with it eventually. I don't think that it adds much to the universe, but I will finish it eventually... I'm dragging my feet on this because the biggest changes are not until the end and it's not always thrilling to wade through a bunch of minor changes. I will say this, though: the rewrite of the Port Angeles chapter sucks. Moreover, Edythe seems barely distinguishable from Edward. Beau is better, but it doesn't make it any easier to get past his name. Overall, the names of the gender-swapped Cullens are terrible. I have heard of people named Emmett and Rosalie before, but Royal? I guess I have to take that statement back now because I just realized that not all of the Cullens have terrible names. Eleanor is decent.

Is that all? Yes, for now. Now, I'm off to find pleasant dreams and even more pleasant realities.
komadori: (*blinks*)
I'm pretty tired today and usually when I'm tired I have trouble finding the right words to say what I want to say, but... not now. What's even stranger is why I'm tired in the first place, because last night I slept more than I normally do.

Also, I keep having dreams where voice actors are my teachers. Before it was only Vic, but last night I dreamt my teacher was... Travis! XD Now Vic makes sense, because I admire him and view him as a role model I can learn from. Not to mention that people call him "sensei" and even I did that for awhile. Travis is cool and all, but I haven't even joined the MSA yet (although, that may change soon) so it seems outta nowhere. Maybe Travis was substituting for Vic and, of course, why not substitute a voice actor-sensei with another random voice actor? It makes sense!

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Robin

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